Don’t do it!

I’m not entirely sure why people are asking me to write about my opinion, but its flattering and I do have a thing or two to say on some of the subjects brought to my attention. Other times I just laugh at them and hope they never request something so stupid. Being a blogger is much like a DJ, if you have a playlist you’re a pro! Just kidding, obviously being a DJ takes skill as does being a blogger, anyone can do it, but not all can do it well. I’m still trying to figure out if I’m one of those back up DJ’s that would be called for a cats funeral but agree to the gig anyway because it gets my name out there. Now I’m not a DJ, but the comparison is on level with being an amateur blogger vs a successful one, same thing.

The other day I was asked by a man in a relationship if I’d like to go see a movie with him. Now, before you get all “WTF He’s a cheater” he isn’t. He asked me to go to a movie with him as a friend, nothing less nothing more. I don’t think he realized that by going to a movie with another female could cause extreme turmoil in his current relationship, so I declined. Truthfully I declined for a number of reasons, the Oscars were on, and like hell was I going to miss Melissa Leo win Best supporting Actress and drop the first F-Bomb in Oscars history. Not only that, but the men were all dressed to the nine’s and I needed to swoon over Mark Wahlberg and how delicious he looked in his Tux, why would anyone want to miss that? After weighing out those two options, the real ‘issue’ came and that was that there’s no way I wanted to be the cause of a fight in someone else’s relationship. I’m all for being friends with the opposite sex, I have many male friends and we do get together and their girlfriends know about it, but I believe some activities are deemed as “romantic, “intimate” or “inviting” and a movie was one of them.

Now, I’m ridiculously secure with myself and in a relationship, I think of my partners being as faithful as the Dalai Lama and figure that anything they decide to do will be for the greater good of the world. But, there are a lot of women who are insecure and would see a movie hang out as a ‘date’ and there is absolutely no way I want to take a shot in the dark to figure it out. Initially he was saying “whatever, she’s cool with things, its just a movie” but after explaining my reasonings, his tuned also changed.  My reasonings? I wouldn’t want my boyfriend going to a movie with another girl just because the activity of choice not because of my lack trust for them. Secondly, I’ve never gone to a movie that didn’t feel like a date, I don’t think I’ve ever been to a movie that didn’t result in some sign of affection taking place. I’ll let you think of what I’m talking about. If you still don’t know, chances are you’ve never seen what goes on in a theatre… Okay, easy now, I’m not that wild.

I couldn’t think of many scenarios that I’d be mad at my Significant Other for doing with a female friend, but a movie and a fine dining experience were the ones that stuck out. If you’re thinking of doing an activity with a male friend or a female friend and the thought “if *name* found out about it, chances are they’d be upset” DON’T do it. Trust your gut, I do, and its never wrong.

Question is, What Activity or activities is a relationship no no?

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2 Responses to Don’t do it!

  1. DJ says:

    Timing is so odd to read this post. Just this weekend my significant other and me were discussing this very subject. We communicate very well and have absolutely no insecurities on where we are at. The only no no’s are sharing intimacy with others. Many of her friends, and mine have been around a long time….and I would never place limits on what activities she may enjoy with them. This is unhealthy in a relationship, and it does come down to trust. You question the other persons commitment when you say well maybe if you do this it would be trouble. If this path gets chosen it was probably bound to happen anyways. Good Post thanks for sharing!!

  2. Jen says:

    I have a strong opinion on this one. Even though people of the opposite sexes are friends, I think that when either is in a serious relationship, there are just some things off limits. Totally agree that a movie is a date or fine dining. I actually think for the most part you should be hanging out more as couples. You can just be friends but even just friends slip up ie. when put in a certain situation or one has had too much to drink etc… why do something that might cause grief. Just not worth hurting the feelings of your significant other

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