Long Distance Relationships – Get outta Town!

Recently I’ve come across a few people who are in Long Distance relationships. This AM I had a friend confide in me with his problems with his LDR. Now, in no way am I an expert to this scenario, I think the longest relationship distance I ever had, was maybe going from NW to SE, and even then it didn’t work out. I was younger okay? Give me a break. Now I have my own car, and own rules, so if you’re worth it I’ll hop on our beautiful ring road and see your cuteself in 30 mins.

I’ve toyed with the idea of potentially having or continuing a relationship and making the sacrifice of not conveniently being able to drop in or have the physical touch from them whenever we were together. Thankfully, it didn’t happen or didn’t work out. I say thankfully simply due to the fact that I was more committed to keeping the relationship alive than they were.

I guess my views and beliefs on the subject are as follows.

Both parties need to discuss their feelings and what they’re going through. If there’s a miscommunication or lack of communication, the relationship will slowly spiral downhill. There also has to be a want of continuing the relationship, lip service isn’t necessary, and in turn one party will get hurt. Those who do end up leaving for reasons of their own, and choose to continue a relationship and weren’t interested in it, why? Did it make the break up easier? You were able to detach yourself due to distance and figure it’ll be an easier way to let things come crashing to a halt? Sometimes as shitty as it is, you’ve got to come to the realization that if you don’t see yourself continuing or coming back in a years time and living closer that cutting your loses now will be easier, and you’ll be respected more.

It takes certain people to be committed and into a LDR. I’m not saying that its right or wrong, I’ve heard of success’ and failures, and the success stories are from those who actually care about their S.O. who aren’t looking to “get it in” with anyone willing to drop trou.  To me its a no brainer, if you care about someone enough and that feeling and respect is reciprocated then distance shouldn’t be an issue. Then again, I know people who can’t stay committed or loyal to their partner they share a house with.

The nice thing is all the different forms of communication there are now, with MSN messenger, Skype, facetime for Iphone users, text messaging and other forms, that allow us to stay connected to our friends or loved ones.  Airlines have plenty of seat sales on a monthly basis that throwing a couple hundred dollars at flights for a weekend trip seems feasible. I’m not certain without being in a very committed relationship that I would willingly throw myself into a LDR, unless I was 100% that we’d work out, that they could be committed. I say they because I have no problem keeping my loyalty to someone I deeply care about.  It’s a two-way street.

So, Question is, would you or are you in a Long distance relationship? Whats the hardest thing to deal with?


About CassieNeil

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2 Responses to Long Distance Relationships – Get outta Town!

  1. Jen says:

    Too hard. I wouldn’t cheat and it can work for a period as long as you know there will be an end, that there is a specific time when you will no longer be long distance. If you love each other enough than 1 will give up where they are and move

  2. John Tyler says:

    Cassie, great posts you have!

    I’ve done a couple of LDR’s. After the first I swore I’d never do it again, but the second one she convinced me it could work, and she was in the UK. That was interesting, and a big mistake. Maybe it’s just me but I don’t see building value in a relationship when most of the communication is by phone or online. Quality time is best spent in person, and in a LDR I don’t think there is enough of that. In the second LDR, I found the relationship imbalanced when we did spend time together. Even though I had gone to a point where I was engaged, I’m glad I ended that nightmare.

    I would never do a LDR again, but that’s me.

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