If there is one thing I’ll never come to understand is why people feel it necessary to harness their children, as if they are an animal. Almost every day I show up to work, there’s at least one kid leashed, and it makes me want to smash my head into my desk. As stupid as I may look with a giant bruise in the middle of my forehead, I’d be rocking a better fashion statement than them.

What has possessed parents or adults looking after the child to throw a harness on them? I think it stems from a lack of discipline and control. If your child can’t listen to you then I suggest teaching them how to listen before taking them out. Its bad enough throwing a basic plain leash on them, but making it “cuter” by putting a little furry lion(or whatever animal) on the back of it, doesn’t make it look any less ridiculous. I’m curious if a study has been done that evaluates the different in social skills or confidence levels in those tied up, versus those who were trained and obedient. I catch myself staring at the little monsters and then silently judge the parent on being a giant loser. Of course I’m not a parent, so its easy for me to point the finger and call someone out how I see fit. But I’ve looked after and been out in public with enough kids to have a general idea of how to control them but I’m pretty sure the pocket full of candy i have helps keep them focused on where I am and what I’m doing that they are in tow, shortly behind.

I feel if you set boundaries for the child and offer a reward for completing the task the child is more likely to listen and continue to listen for future outings (again not a parent, but I’ve seen enough Super Nanny Episodes to have a basic understanding of control).

To be honest when I see parents laughing at their kid for “pulling” them, it makes me want to slap them. I have no idea why they think it’s so funny that their kid is acting like a dog allowing them to lead the way to their destination. Why don’t you command them to bark while their at it, and when you’re talking to someone tell them to sit or they won’t be getting their treat. I’m still trying to figure out what bastard invented the stupid harness’ and  when society deemed it okay to strap these things on their back.  The last thing about these things that absolutely drive me insane is when the child happens to throw a fit on the floor and instead of bending over to pick them up, they pull the leash up to get them off the floor. I can’t say I blame them for throwing a tantrum, I’d be doing whatever I could to humiliate my “walker,” and if that meant crying until I vomited, then so be it.(yes I’ve seen it happen); but I’m a spiteful bitch, and at three, I’m sure I’d know how to “pay back” the moron “walking” me. I suppose I can’t blame the harness for dragging the kid up, but the stupid person operating it.

Parents, please don’t procreate if your plan to go on a family outing involves throwing a leash on your kid. If you do go ahead and decide to go out with the leash, please know, that the people looking at you, are judging you, I assure you their thoughts arn’t nice, unless of course they’re like you, and think your idea is great.

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About CassieNeil

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