My entire life I’ve always grown up with my Mum saying “know your worth” when I was younger I never really understood this phrase she used to say, I used to think it was incase she wanted to put me up for sale. But as I grew older and faced a situation I was uncomfortable in or was upset about, may it be in a work situation or a relationship of any kind, she would continue to say her famous phrase. I began to think it through a little more, and began evaluating my “worth” it started small and then I began to apply it to almost any major decision I’d come to make, like what job I was going to take, or who I associated myself with, whether that was a friendship or even a relationship.
When I’d evaluate my job or career situation, I always thought it’d be difficult to figure out what I was worth. Simply whatever the company was willing to offer me as a per hour, or salary (I thought) was all i was worth. But it then dawned on my that these hourly wages or salary’s they were offering were the bottom base pay, that anyone desperate enough for the position or job would accept it. If “X” company wanted me to switch from my current job to theirs, they’d have to offer me something substantial enough to take the risk. At this time i decided my worth, and for the first time ever it began to make sense to me. If you think of an article of clothing or an electronic gadget, the nicer it looks or more high-tech it is, it usually comes at a cost(of course there are exceptions), but because it looks nicer, you want it more than the one that’s a model or generation below it, if you substitute yourself for that piece of clothing or electronic device, you’ve found yourself in the same situation. The person who wants the flashier pair of jeans, or the newest blackberry or Iphone to hit the shelves, is going to have to pay a little bit extra for something they want. What they want is you; providing they’ve scoped you out. (again everything is situational, and I’m simply basing off my own experiences). So, are you the first generation blackberry/Iphone, or are you the new model that everyone wants? That’s entirely up to you to decide.
In relationships it often wasn’t me evaluating what my worth was, but what theirs was I already knew what I wanted. Could they meet the criteria that I’ve made a mental check list for? Maybe they fit 6/8 of those criteria, but I give it a go anyway, because maybe I can over look what they can’t meet. Personally these character flaws stick out worse than a sore thumb, and I often find myself growing (sometimes) silently agitated, what is my worth If I’m willing to settle for someone second best to what I deserve? Often times the relationship comes to an end shortly after it started based on my needs or desires in that other person aren’t getting met. If it aint there to start, it won’t be there in the end. Think back to the shirt example I used. You walk into your favorite store, and make a B-Line to the sale rack, because you see the shirt you’ve wanted for ages and its now on sale. Keep looking at the sales, and you see a couple of shirts you don’t mind, but don’t love, but because their cheap and a good deal, you sling them over your arm to try on. You’ve picked out a few shirts now, and head to the dressing room to try them on. The first shirt you try on is the one you love (but everyone has) much like a partner, everyone has also been with them. Get rid of that one. Next, you have a shirt you like, but don’t love, and you try it on anyway because it fits part of the criteria you’re looking for, once on you realize it doesn’t accentuate your good features, and almost makes them look worse, do you settle for okay, or do you put it back? (if you don’t like it at the store, you won’t like it in your closet). Understand where I’m going? I’m not saying that I believe You should fall in love with every person before going out with them or dating them, but don’t date someone who doesn’t help accentuate your great features or qualities. There’s a reason these shirts are on sale (or why men or women are still single) Are you willing to settle for something that looks okay, but not great? Are you looking to settle for someone who treats you good, but not great?
It can be hard to step back and remove yourself from the situation you’re in, settling emotions and attachments aside, are you truly happy? Sometimes admitting whats wrong with something, allows you to break free. Don’t settle for second best with anything because you truly are number one, and deserve to be treated that way.
What is your worth?