Today’s Blog idea was brought to my attention by another Blogger, who wrote about Facebook and its various annoyances. My blog is slightly different, I don’t care so much about the requests to join “Mafia wars” or “Cafe World” but what absolutely annoys me are the people who get way too personal or update ridiculous things in the “What’s on your mind” section of the profile. Facebook itself is fine, but what its allowed my acquaintances to do, not good.
“What’s on your mind?” A list of things I (as your “friend”) don’t care to read.
1. Rant about how shitty your life is.
You aren’t getting child support? Guess what? We don’t care. It was your stupid ass’ fault you got knocked up with some dead beat guys’ child and not only are you left to suffer the consequences of both your actions, SO ARE WE. (I know he’s a deadbeat because you’ve also posted that in one of your status’)
2. Calling people out with/without using a name.
I’m sorry, but I think the messaging system works just fine. If you need me to check to see it still works then I’ll allow you to fire off a message to me and if I get it I’ll tell you. I hate seeing this one the most, “You are so stupid I fucking hate you.” Etc. If the message gets any longer there’s usually 10 spelling mistakes, sentence fragments and usually sentences that are made sentences, but really aren’t or uncompleted. But you’re mad, And fuck being smart and poised about venting your anger. Your friends? The rest of us? Ya we suffer and get headaches trying to figure out what you’re trying to say and once we have we either “like” it for fear your next update will be targeted toward us OR we comment on it calling YOU out or supporting you. You don’t like confrontation, obviously its easier to hide behind a screen than face the person. To no surprised, your next status is “I don’t need your approval for what I post on my facebook” you’re right. Moving on…
3. Relationship emotions, or lack of relationship.
“He forgot our 2 month anniversary! What an asshole” or “I love him so so so so so much I hate being apart from (name) love you sOoOoO much pookey!” These status’ make me want to slap myself silly. Men are idiots, I get from one status and girls are pathetic, in another. Don’t get me wrong I’m all for addressing problems within a relationship and agree with telling someone how I feel about them, do my friends care to know we’re fighting? Do my friends care to know what pet name I have for you? Not so much. Also I’ll address the 3rd problem. Whining about being single, or emo song updates because of your relationship status. Still wondering why you’re Single? Yes? Think a guy/girl is going to want to date a mopey and emotional nutjob? I’m not sure anyone would sign up for that willingly, unless forced to by an arrangement. Go outside and meet someone, little effort required.
“Baby took first steps omgomgomgomg” you know, that’s cool and all and I’m glad your kid can walk, but after reading how the kid slept for 3 hours last night, they ate their first solid food or how the kid won’t stop screaming, all within 30 mins of each other I begin to think your baby isn’t cute anymore, but more of a hassle and annoying. When I read these consecutively, I think my uterus shrivels up and my want for children begins to disappear.
5.Inability to type/spell.
I’ll give an example and say nothing after it, you get where I’m going.
A) u tink ur sew kewl aktin the wai u do wen ur wit ur frendz. (Need I say more? Painful, wasn’t it?)
B) ~FlOaT lIkE a BuTtErFlY sTiNg LiKe a BeE~ (what the hell kind of font is that? Again, also painful, and stupid)
These Five things are some of the biggest annoyances for me that often drive me to click their profile and hover over the delete button and contemplate (for all about 5 seconds) if deleting you is a good idea. That’s quickly answered when I remember the shit you just posted, and delete becomes a great idea.
And don’t forget to follow me on twitter @Mizzfittscloset
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